Sunday, June 6, 2010

patriotism and derrière

Despite the incoming faux-patriotic surge roused by the World Cup I cannot say Brazilians truly like being Brazilian. "Brazilianhood" is more of a sad fact of life you learn to accept, like earthquakes and religious fanatics. And I say that being of Italian-Spanish-Portuguese-Indian ascent, the most common possible ancestries here in São Paulo. I’m as ordinary a Brazilian as they come (sucky, eh).

We have some few good stuff in here. Food, language, Eddy Gordo and the butts. Brazilians tend to have great asses. But even when it comes to that very welcome quality, I don't thing we are number one. Even though my favourite men in this world are Australian, Scottish, English and Mexican, my current favourite male behinds are from a Spaniard and two Americans. No Brazilians included.

The Spanish butt is from Rafael Nadal, who I would guess doesn't require further commentary (Nadal wedgies For The Motherfucking Win, his wedgies are the sole reason I even know there exists a sport called tennis).

The Americans butts are from a random gorgeous camguy called Jesse Gates (here's a naughty video) and the Patrick Kerney. Kerney's butt must have been handcrafted by God himself, seriously - it's my favourite in this world. In fact, I'd say football players have the sexiest posteriors ever, followed closely by rugby players. Lovely how all those manly sports are non-existent in here - instead we have god-damned FOOTBALL and all those hideous looking players as the national passion. Ugh.
(although... I have to admit there's a handful of good looking football players, none of them from Brazil, obviously - it's like Brazilians have to be facially deformed in order to perform well in the pitch)

I really can’t think of many Brazilians who can compare to Kerney, Jesse and Nadal, and I'm subject to several hot behinds every day. The closest one I can think of is this massive booty from this tall hot blond guy from work. Clearly Brazil is outclassed even in its greatest asset... but, well, it's World Cup, we're the football country, go Brazil! ...oh God, why was I born here. *sigh*

No comments:

Post a Comment